For both your enjoyment (and because writing is more therapeutic for me than grinding a cheese grater against my forehead) I have provided her gleefully bigoted list below, with a few interjections of my own:
(Tiffany’s words are in italics… The rest is me. Enjoy.)
Here is why I have to abandon attempts at intelligent conversation with most of you.
Um… Because you’re incapable? (Sorry… But you kinda softballed that one in there.)
1. You support revisionist history.
Okay…
Let me save you three paragraphs of nonsense. Apparently, reminding
kids that America has traditionally been the single most ardent
proponent of individual liberty (and by extension: prosperity) is
“revisionist” history… But “forgetting” to tell kids that Republicans fought for civil rights, and FDR opposed anti-lynching laws is what qualifies as “history” in LiberalAmerica.
2. You cite Jesus as your reasoning for rejecting marriage equality.
Yet the Bible only mentions homosexuality six times. Six. Times. 6!
I
know it sounds crazy, but I don’t really require my God to tell me
things multiple times. More importantly, is that gay marriage isn’t as
much about homosexuality as it is about marriage. The bible
might only say something about homosexuality 6 times, but it rambles on
quite a bit about the importance of loving one another as God loves his
church. Go talk to a priest about marriage… They literally have
encyclopedic volumes on the topic from the Bible.
So why is this one of the biggest issues on your agenda?
It’s not.
Why are you putting so much energy and hate into an issue that clearly wasn’t one of God’s major concerns?
It’s not hate. It’s a difference of opinion. Grow up.
As Christians who are
pro-family, why would you deny people the right to the sanctity of
marriage? If marriage strengthens families, why would you not want
everyone to have this, even if you disagree with their choice of mate?
Because two guys (or girls) deciding to live (and love) together isn’t the same thing as a “family”.
YOU
(we) have destroyed the sanctity of marriage. There is no possible way
that gay marriage can do more harm to marriage than heterosexuals have
done. Yet we seldom hear a sermon bemoaning the divorce rate or people
living together before marriage.
Actually, I hear preachers
talk about that a lot… I’m catholic, and we had to take a class on it
before taking our vows. What’s your point?
3. You use Biblical scripture to excuse yourself from feeding the hungry.
C’mon… Jesus will make them a fish.
There is nothing you do that makes me more disgusted with you than your abuse and misuse of 2 Thessalonians 3:10.
For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, If any will not work, neither let him eat. 2 Thessalonians 3:10
You
are deliberately taking the scripture — ONE VERSE! — out of context
when you use them to justify your own hatred of poor people. And again,
you’re showing your ignorance.
Wow… So, because we don’t
believe that government is best equipped to handle “charitable” causes,
you accuse us of hating the poor? How terribly Christian of you. The truth is, most Christian conservatives give plenty to charity… Government is not charity. Government is crony, corrupted, and inefficient. We think too highly of the poor to tell them to go to a government building for help.
4. You lie when you say you value “freedom of religion.”
This
coming from a lady who’s political movement has had children suspended
from praying at their school lunch, had coaches fired for leading the
team in a (voluntary) team prayer, and tried to scrub “in god we trust”
from our currency…Freedom of religion is not the same thing as freedom from religion. If “under God” offends you, don’t say it.
Let’s move on to number five:
5. You claim God speaks to you and tells you to do things.
Over
and over and over, we see right wing nutjobs in the news saying they’re
doing this horrible thing or that horrible thing because God told them
to.
Something tells me you’re not talking about Muslims…
This is, to quote the Christian Courier, “a very convenient method of authenticating what you want to do.”
He does NOT do that.
Right… I mean, Noah just built a giant wooden ship on a whim.
God,
having of old time spoken unto the fathers in the prophets by divers
portions and in divers manners, hath at the end of these days spoken
unto us in his Son. Hebrews 1:1
But
conservatives believe these nuts. Here is what I think: not only should
sensible conservatives not believe these nuts, you need to start
speaking out against them. These are the false prophets that the Bible
warns us about, in my humble opinion. Most of you lack the courage to
take a stand against these idiots even when you know they’re nuts.
Gotcha…
Apparently “freedom of religion” means mocking and degrading religious
people who you think are “nuts”. Now I’m starting to get it.
6. You question my faith.
“Christian Left is an oxymoron.”
Oh
my, I’ve heard that so much from the right, and believe it or not, I
often hear it from my “friends.” First of all, your questioning of my
faith genuinely means very little to me. What it does is destroy my
opinion of you; I now view you as self-righteous hypocrites.
Says the lady who just spent three bullet points explaining that my understanding of my faith is an illustration of my buffoonery.
Keep questioning my faith, though, my people, because you can be sure I’m questioning yours.
Didn’t you call me a hypocrite recently?
One thing I won’t do, however, is accuse you of not being a believer as you do me.
I
never said you didn’t believe. I just questioned whether or not
supporting the murder of unborn children is very Christian. I mean,
“What would Jesus do?”
What I will
suggest to you is that my faith may be stronger than yours. I’ve
educated myself, dared to question all things, and STILL believe. Most
of you are too afraid to even learn. It may, after all, test your faith.
Wow.
So, if I understand you correctly, you’re enlightened… But anyone who
happens to think that certain liberal values are incompatible with the
teaching of Christ are (apparently) bigoted, weak, uncultured sheep. How
very tolerant and understanding!
I’ll pray for you! :)
Thanks. I already prayed for you. Maybe we’ll see results sometime soon.
7. You care more about your guns than you do about children.
After
the Sandy Hook massacre, and following other similar tragedies, I asked
many of you if you loved your guns more than you do children. I made
the statement of “I’d give up my gun forever if it would bring back even
one of those children.”
I asked you if you’d do the same. You admitted that you would not.
I’m not sure how giving up my
gun (which hasn’t actually shot anyone) will bring a dead kid back to
life. But, while we’re on the subject, I own guns so that I can protect
my family from the type of senseless and random violence that we saw in
Newtown. After all, studies have proven that .45 caliber slugs tend to
be more effective at stopping bad guys than rape whistles or hugs. Maybe that’s what you don’t “get”. Guns aren’t more important than children. And that’s exactly why we need them.
8. You get excited about people dying.
No… Al Sharpton gets excited about people dying. It means he gets to march somewhere.
You
really, really like to see death. And not just to terrorists. You love
the death penalty. You love war. You love seeing kids like Trayvon
Martin being shot. They deserve it, you say. But his murderer has shown —
again and again — since his acquittal that he is a dangerous person.
George Zimmerman is an idiot. But we don’t put people behind bars for being an idiot.As for terrorists, war, and the death penalty… Yeah. I like the fact that someone who raped, murdered, and tortured other human beings will no longer be breathing the same air as the rest of us. I guess I’m weird.
9. You assume that everyone who needs help are losers and parasites who refuse to work.
Approximately
47 million people receive food stamps, and most of them are children or
the elderly, in addition to people who are employed.
If 47
million people are on food stamps, that means that our economy is so
abysmal 47 million people can’t even purchase their own food, there is
rampant fraud in the system, people game the system, or a combination of
all three… Pick one. The problem isn’t that people need food stamps. The problem is that people like you measure their compassion by how many people are using government assistance. Compassion should be measured by how many people no longer need assistance for basic things like food.
The most rousing testimonial of an entitlement program should be its obvious obsolescence.
10. You weren’t concerned about uninsured people– including me.
It’s all about you, isn’t it?It’s a matter of method, lady. Government regulated healthcare (like what the VA has) isn’t really the best way to help the needy. I’m so happy you have insurance now. Have you said “thanks” to any of the millions of people that lost their preferred coverage to make sure you have your contraception pills for free?
11. The Creation Museum — that is all.
You
think this is OK. It’s not. These people just make stuff up. Do you
really think kangaroos floated from Africa to Australia on rafts? Why
are you condoning this ignorance?
I’m not. But this is another great example of how “tolerant” you are of people who have different belief structures. (But I’m the bigot for pointing out that today’s terrorists routinely yell “Allah Akbar” before killing people. Sheesh.)
12. You’re liberal in youth, yet grow conservative in age.
…
You don’t get to live it up as a young person and then try to take a
moral high ground when you get old and aren’t interested in living
anymore.
Here’s some quick words of advice I once got from a
very wise man: If you don’t change by the time you grow up, then you’re
still acting like a spoiled child. Time to change, Tiffany.
13. You don’t want people who disagree with you to vote.
Oh,
Gerrymandering, you ugly devil, you. But do we question why this is so
common and seldom questioned by people on the right? It’s because you,
my conservative voter loved ones, agree with it. You think it’s
perfectly acceptable (and necessary) to suppress the vote. It’s for the
“good of the nation.”
Stop telling me what I believe. Democrats have been Gerrymandering voting districts for decades.
14. Some of your best friends are black. Or Mexican.
I don’t care how many black or Hispanic friends you have. If you think that mentality is OK, then yes, you’re racist.
I’ll stop pointing out how many black and Hispanic friends I have when you stop shouting that I’m a racist.
15. You scream about undocumented immigrant children at the border, but you hire Mexicans to do your dirty work.
I
live in Texas. Duh! Every single upper-middle-class or wealthy person I
know has at one time hired cheap labor to do their menial tasks like
home repairs, yard work, housekeeping, and childcare. They actually seek
out Hispanic people because they know that they do good work and that
they’ll work for cheap.
So all illegals are Mexicans? Wow… And we’re the racists? (And by the way, we scream about people breaking the law. It has nothing to do with race.)
16. You insist on calling undocumented immigrants “illegals” and “aliens.”
Well…
They’re immigrants (identified technically as “aliens”) who are here
illegally… But if it makes you feel better, I’ll change my vernacular.
How about “criminal immigrants” since they committed a crime by
immigrating illegally?
They are human beings. They are undocumented immigrants.
Right… And all those people who sell coke are just “undocumented” pharmacists.
Many
of them are children. It reallyyyyy makes me furious to see you
deliberately depersonalizing these human beings who are doing nothing
but seeking the American Dream that you are so proud of.
I’m pretty sure a prerequisite to following the “American” dream is to become an American.
And
you do this on purpose. You know what you’re doing. You’re proud of
your very unethical and un-Christian attitude towards these human
beings.
Un-Christian? Drop your self-aggrandized moral
supremacy for just a minute, and understand that you don’t own the
patent on compassion. An individual who breaks the law to come into this
country is… an unlawful resident of this country: AKA: An Illegal
Immigrant.If you can’t even handle the English language, how are we supposed to have a conversation about the underlying problems?
17. You don’t mind using force against “lesser” groups to get what you want.
Case in point, protesting outside of abortion clinics.
Wait… Protesting is “force”? Then can I charge Mom’s Demand Action with assault for holding signs outside my favorite Starbucks?
Or
protesting at the funerals of gay people. And yeah, I know that is
Westboro Baptist Church and not you, but if you refuse to speak out
against them, then you’re a part of the problem.
Really? Do you feel the same way about the “moderate Muslims” of the world?
18. You love war, death, and destruction.
And
why do you love war, death, and destruction? Because ‘Murica. Because
you think this somehow makes us superior. We may be militarily superior,
but we are ethically inferior.
Nah… You’re right. We should have just learned German.
Even when confronted with the lies, now confirmed officially, that got us into the Iraq war, you don’t care.
Lies? Listen carefully you maniacally biased liberal hack: American heroes hauled enough Yellow-Cake Uranium out of Iraq to make 14 Hiroshima bombs.
Those “lies” proved to be precisely accurate. And now Vladimir Putin’s
buddy, Bashar Al Assad of Syria, is shuffling around a handful of
chemical weapons with Iraqi labeling. I get it: You didn’t like the war. Stop trying to exonerate Saddam. It’s unbecoming, even for a liberal shill.
You like for America to be the world’s largest terrorist organization and the world’s most formidable bully.
I wouldn’t mind some child-killing, women-raping, Jordanian-pilot-burning thugs in the Middle East to think of us that way.
19. Speaking of war, you think draft dodging is OK and military service is for the little people.
Why
doesn’t it bother you that Dick Cheney et al are draft dodgers? Or that
Mitt Romney has an entire baseball team of sons and not one of them
served in the military? Or that none of the current generation of Bush
children have served in the military.
First of all, most conservatives don’t like the draft. Second of all, go soak your head. I’m sure a Marine will help.
20. You claim to care about the Constitution, but in reality you don’t.
Oh
yes, you scream “CONSTITUTION” at the top of your lungs, but when
idiotic Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) recently tried to strip the Constitution
of the 5th and 6th Amendments, where were you? Where was your outrage?
Wait, you claim that Ted is stripping away the 5th and 6th Amendment because he wants to revoke the passport of anyone that fights with ISIS?
At least he’s not asking to intern all Arab Americans, like FDR wanted
to do with Japanese immigrants during the second World War. I hate to break it to you, but taking the passport away from a self-admitted enemy of the state is not a violation of the Constitution… Of course, we could just ask for the death penalty. I mean, that is kinda spelled out.
You love the parts of the Constitution that please you personally — NOT the entire Constitution.
Says the lady who just asked us to give up our guns (for the “children”).
21. It’s impossible for you to see your privilege.
We see our privilege. We’re just more focused on making sure everyone has opportunity.
22. You don’t care about children.
Says the lady that supports abortion.
You care about fetuses.
Oh, good… You read my mind.
Once
those fetuses begin to breath outside the womb, your concern is gone if
they’re born into a poor family that needs help. Or how about poor
children who are in school? Most of you want to do away with free and
reduced lunches, for God’s sake. And let’s not even talk about free
breakfasts for kids. What is wrong with you people??? There is no better
investment that we can make as a nation than in the early childhood
health of our children.
Wait… Didn’t you just tell us that
47 million people have food stamps so poor children don’t have to go
hungry? If poverty in America needs this much help, I’d have to say your
anti-poverty programs are clearly not a rousing success. Maybe we
should try something new.
23. You’re greedy and miserable.
But you created a list of 28 things you hate about other human beings… So I kinda feel like I have a slightly happier outlook on life.
You spend more time bemoaning what is being taken from you that you do in being thankful that you have enough to share.
If you take much more from me, I won’t have anything left to share.
24. You think our religion is the only one.
I’m a Christian — a proud follower of the most amazing man I’ve ever studied.
Okay. I always learned that Jesus was a touch more than just an “amazing man”; but I get your point.
Most
of what is good about me comes from the teachings of Jesus. I love my
religion and my Holy Book. I use the Words in Red as a compass. But who
am I to look at other people who feel exactly the same way about their
own religions and judge them?
I dunno. You’re doing a bang-up job judging people by their political beliefs.
25. You are lazy and you refuse to read.
I
provide sources for you that will debunk most of your BS, or at least
help you to see it a little differently. You refuse to read it. You
stick to Fox News, World Net Daily, etc…You refuse to ever entertain
another point of view.
When was the last time you read Karl
Marx? I read him (again) roughly a year ago. Just because someone
disagrees with you doesn’t mean they’re ignorant, or brainwashed. But
believing that they are tells us something about you.
26. Your misfortune is God’s blessing.
When
something bad happens to you, you sanctimoniously think it’s God
testing you and making you stronger. When something bad happens to me
(or gay people or atheists or etc…), you think it’s God punishing them.
Really?
Stop
telling me what I believe. It’s getting old. (And this might be part of
the reason you can’t have an intelligent conversation with people who
don’t think like you do.)
27. “Everyone has their lot in life.”
Except
you, of course. Well, no….you do have a lot. Your lot is to have every
privilege and entitlement and make sure your children have the same.
Yeah, we want the best for our kids. We’re horrible human beings.(And, by the way, we generally believe people should be given the opportunity to change their lot in life.)
28. You think you’re the only one working and paying taxes.
“My
tax dollars….” Here’s a clue: you’re not the only one paying taxes.
Liberals pay taxes, too. Just how far do you think your $2,000 a year in
income taxes goes? Or your $10,000, or even your $50,000? No matter how
wealthy you are and how much income tax you pay — and most of those
complaining aren’t paying that much — you’re actually probably paying
more for wars (that you love) than for food stamps for children in
poverty.
Well, actually Defense spending is roughly 18 percent of the US budget, with approximately 69 percent of the budget comprised of wealth transfer programs (entitlements, welfare, and social security)… So, actually, I am paying for those food stamps. But, go ahead and wrap up your hate mail (cleverly disguised as a column):
All
of this said, let me say this: I’m very grateful and appreciative of my
sane conservative friends who can actually participate in an
intelligent and respectful discussion.
It must be tough with you calling them un-educated Christian bigots who tend to be racist.
Thank
you, my dear ones, for being sane. For understanding that things aren’t
always black and white. And for disagreeing with me without belittling
my very existence.
Kinda like you just did to conservatives 28 times in a row?
And for not rubbing midterm losses in my face.
Like the President rubbed his two victories in the face of the GOP?
And for never once calling me stupid or amoral for being a liberal.
I wouldn’t call you that… I just think you could use a bit more education and ethical direction.
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